Part Four
Chapter 31
THE OUTRIDERS
"Tungebunge sphex!"
Monwyrt slapped angrily at the buzzing pests. Where had they come from? He hadn't been bothered by them much the previous three days, no more than ever on any run through the forest. But now, just when he thought he could make himself comfortable in the fens, the maddening things were swarming around him.
The ground was harder, drier, here close to the acabee, and he soon found some decayed branches and boles which seemed to be dry enough to burn. Sure enough, the spearcastan strike bit, and a welcome little flame sputtered and danced through the tinder. The punky fuel burned quickly and not very hot, and gave off clouds of smoke. But that was fine with Monwyrt: the sphex couldn't breathe in the smoke, and let up stinging him.
The sky was still a homogenous lactic haze. Monwyrt tasted the air, trying to guess whether it would rain again soon. It hadn't rained since he had found himself in the mersc, and that puzzled him. From everything the Laizuvrians had told him about the wet season he had expected many hand-days of downpours, and not merely two or three days' worth. Of course, he was no longer in the plains... he wondered how it could be that everything was so different here.
He set up his little camp around the fire, and fell instinctively into an attentive silence. The smoke would pretty well clear out any potential game downwind, he knew; but the breeze was not strong, and down in the foliage was barely detectible, so the smoke wouldn't spread far. Any serious hunting wouldn't be spoiled.
He tried to guess, as he listened to the weird cries and calls of the mersc, which of them might be from creatures of sufficient size to make worthy game. It was a vain exercise, but it served to familiarize his sharp ears to the distinct voices. What began as a chaotic discordant chorus slowly resolved into a recognizable, even predictable, rhythm as he listened. Monwyrt soon could concentrate on a single call, fixing its direction, predicting its next sounding, until, satisfied that he knew all there was to know by listening alone, he turned his attention to the next. In this way he classified the wildlife of the fens - at least, the wildlife with voices - mentally compiling orders according to pitch, speed, and location (water or land).
He resolved to find out what type of beasts these voices came from, and arose from his seat by the fire and slung his water-bladder across his shoulder. Harkening for one moment longer to a particular cry he thought had some promise, he paused, then walked out of camp into the jungle.
It took only a few short moments for him to regret his action. The sphex did not hesitate to attack in renewed numbers once he was out of the smoke, and they soon became such a nuisance that he was forced to turn back at a run. Slapping and scraping himself, Monwyrt rushed back to his fire and stood practically astride it to surround himself with smoke. He crushed the last tenacious sphex with a blood-splattering crunch, and backed out of the smoke a pace or two to look himself over.
His arms and shoulders were swollen and covered with sore-looking welts, and he could feel more all across his back. He had a few on his chest and legs and face, indeed, he was virtually covered with sting-marks. "Moc!" he cursed, dreading the next day, when the swelling would ease, but the stings would begin to itch. He lay down beside the fire, ate an acabee fruit, and groused.
"If only there were thriddahype in this moc-mersc!" he ranted. "I could just call them to me, and not have to hunt."
He lay there irritably, stirring only to feed the fire, listening to the chirks and cries of the fens. They seemed to mock him now, he thought, as if they knew they were safe from him. He steamed in his frustration. The creatures taunted him. "Here we are!" they cried. "Come get us! Ha! Ha! Ha!"
"Tungebunge!" Monwyrt muttered. "If only they were thriddahypes! I would call and - !" He broke off his thought suddenly. "Um!" he smiled. "Um, it's worth a try!"
"Cursed espavee!"
"Cursed espavee?! Curse you!"
"Curse me? It was your idea, orpensnucestee, to look for the acabee!"
"Liar!"
"Adospee!"
Binatree and Unustree were racing through the marish with all due haste, plunging into the water where it interrupted their path and paddling across, and climbing out, dripping, on the other side. They were making a direct line for Bisuree, the great dwelling-place of their folk, to report on their discovery. Long strides made for rapid progress, but they were being plagued by the swarms of horrid, stinging espavees that had suddenly materialized around them. Their short arms were woefully inadequate in their efforts to fend off the preying pests, and they turned and squirmed and contorted themselves into all sorts of unlikely positions to discourage the attack.
"How positively dismaying!" remarked Unustree, slapping ineffectually. "They are quite persistant, are they not? Odee cipiacee blots!"
"Nothing gets past you, does it? I have made the same observation myself!" returned Binatree. "However, if you will permit, I believe I can offer one, if only one, positive comment in regards to the espavees. They're not as big as you are a fool!"
"And, luckily, they are only twice as smart as you! Delightful!" gushed Unustree. "I do believe I'm ready to hear something enlightening. Of course you have my permission to expound away! And to drop dead!"
"You are too kind! Thank you. Ermisvee!"
At that moment they plunged into another channel crossing.
"Not at all. Please proceed. to drown!"
"At least they can't sting under water. Thank you, again. As I was saying," said Binatree, "and as I am quite sure you are already fully aware, although it may not have occurred to you in your - " he slapped at another espavee "your discomfort; that even though the eating of the acabee draws the appetites of the espavees, it also prevents the resulting stings from festering unduly. Thank the Orsnumquammee!"
"I wish it prevented you from festering unduly! Icsee, that is some consolation for tomorrow," Unustree agreed, waving his arms wildly. "Unfortunately, this is today!"
"Oh, that was profound! Let me remember that! 'This is today!' How inspiring! Please, let us not belabor the subject further!" Binatree petitioned to change the subject. "We must compose a most impressive report, I fear, to justify having altered our rounds. Let's lie for our lives!"
"Aexfee. Binatree, again your remarkable genius sparkles! In spite of your absence of wit. Our report may determine the difference between a stunning promotion and a disasterous demotion," commented Unustree.
"Any promotion you might receive would indeed be stunning! Icsee, we must craft a most convincing narrative," said Binatree. "Please, Unustree, my superior, my leader, and, I am not ashamed to admit it, my inspiration; let me hear the introductory statements to what will surely prove to be the instrument of our glory. Glorious disgrace!"
"While any promotion you might receive would indeed be disasterous! Thank you for your indulgent sycophancy, entirely justified, of course!" demurred Unustree, "and as you have so astutely anticipated, I am already in pursuit of an idea; but since this idea of mine pertains to the closing and decisive statements of our report I was assuming you might condescend to author the opening. Choke, orpensnucestee!"
"Aexfee, you have an idea! It must be a strange feeling for you! What a series of amazing coincidences this life is! I, too, am mentally composing what can only be a winning litany of facts and observations pertaining to our experience," Binatree chimed in, "and I am as yet undecided whether it would best be inserted as the main body of our report, or as an overwhelming addendum following your conclusion. Either way, we still need a spectacular opening. Again, dazzle me with the required wordplay we seek, commander! While I try to remember what we're talking about."
"Ermisvee. Your compliments are most uncalled for! and most appropriate. Please, I categorically insist that you speak first!" insisted Unustree.
"Adospee. I promise you, I will speak first," returned Binatree sincerely, "after your introductory remarks."
"Ofaexedee!"
"Ebeshee odee cipiacee!"
They continued on, striding at a great pace, arguing politely and caustically.
Binatree and Unustree were outriders, border guards, called omofinishees in their own tongue. It was their duty to provide the first stand of defense against any attack on Bisuree, as well as give as much warning of that attack as possible. They were only two of many; Usunee, the exalted leader of the race, had doubled and trebled the force of omofinishees in late seasons, owing to a disturbing number of recurring nightmares of his portending a deadly invasion of undescribed enemies. Usunee, though quite aged and wise, was so convinced that these dreams were a sure sign of destruction that he had kindled the entire race to a raging fever of paranoia, even though they had no known enemies. But then, the unknown aspect of the threat only made it seem all the more sinister and impending.
The Eatopygiastees were a mild, peaceful folk. They lived on the edge of the fens, at the base of a long, long rolling slope which eventually developed into the foothills of the mountains which curved in a great arc around three sides of their land, with the fourth side marked by the fens. They were industrious, talented, intelligent, and disciplined. They had brought their society to a level they considered to be the pinnacle of civilisation, and every deed and act was performed solely for the common good, and for no other reason. Their very names reflected their positions in the heirarchy of their society, and as they distinguished themselves, they would be promoted, and given different names. This at times caused some confusion, but everyone admitted it was the ultimate system in terms of expediency for the chain of command.
That chain began with the Eatopygiastee named Usunee. At the moment, Usunee had not changed for many, many seasons, which reflected his good governance, and the Eatopygiastees had prospered. His credibility had grown, and so his power had also grown, until the current uneasiness had arisen due to his fear of invasion. There were a few high-ranking Eatopygiastees who dared to doubt Unusee's vision, although none dared to disobey him outright. After all, what if he should prove to be right, and they were about to be attacked, as preposterous as it sounded? Usunee had always been right about everything. So the skeptics held their peace, and waited.
But if some of the leaders were dubious about Usunee's dreams, very few of the underlings were, and his orders were followed precisely, even to the extent of assigning omofinishees to the Mists. It was the concensus of everyone that a serious attack would be impossible to mount from that direction, but just in case, two hapless outriders were sent out there. And, being the lowest of the low-ranking omofinishees, Binatree and Unustree were chosen for the odious chore.
Two wearying days of walking after what they had come to call their "sighting," Binatree and Unustree came to Bisuree. Without stopping at their own abodes to refresh and rescent themselves, which tempted them sorely, they made directly for the outriders' hut, where they received all their assignments. Inanilquatertrinaquee silently listened to their report (hardly the masterwork they had hoped for) with an eyebrow which kept cocking itself up notch by notch as they went on, until it took his demeanor way beyond stern to approximate gurn.
"Ebeshees. Thank you for your most distracting tale," he told them when they had finished. "If you would be so kind as to mark these idascees, and sign your confession! I will instruct you further." They obligingly recorded their names on the inevitable forms with the stylus he provided. "Thank you," said Inanilquatertrinaquee, eyeing the signatures narrowly. "Choke! Now, asmees, you of course realize that returning from your assigned rounds before term is a serious violation. Your report indicates that you believe its contents to fully justify your decision to desert your post. I am not sure I agree. A few seasons ago, I would have laughed at it as an obvious fabrication by two omofinishees eager to leave the Mists. But things have, supposedly, changed, and all reports, no matter how ridiculous," he looked at them severely, "must be investigated. Therefore, I must require you to go now to Inatrinabinaniltree and resubmit this report. Give her this," he shoved another idascee toward them. "Go! Adospees!" They sulkily turned to shuffle out. "Aexfee! Wait!" he shouted, quickly looking down at one of the idascees. "Inabinaniltrinaquinaquaterbinatree!"
Binatree turned back and froze at attention. "Icsee, Inanilquatertrinaquee?" he trembled.
"Fool! Would you kindly return to me my stylus?"
Half the day later, the sky was turning dark, and the two outriders were tired and hungry.
"Odee cipiacee! When, luckless companion, is this going to end?" Unustree whined.
"When we are dead. I fail to understand the situation, myself," Binatree returned.
They were reluctantly making their way up the Eatopygiasteen chain of command. Inanilquatertrinaquee sent them on to Inatrinabinaniltree. She had sent them to Usquaterquaternilunee, who had in turn directed them to Inaquinaquinaquee. From her they had reported to Inanilquaterbee, then Usnilquinaunee, then Inabinatree. He had at first exploded with mirth, but, thinking again, had grown very grave, and told them to go, on his authority, straight to Inaquee.
"We're dead. We're dead. We'll be sent to the Mists forever. Do you agree, Inabinaniltrinaquinaquaterunustree, that our last report was delivered with the most polish of any so far?" Binatree asked cheerily.
"Polish?! We're about to be demoted to names it will take us a season to memorize, and you're concerned about elocution? Please, to you I am simply Unustree," he replied graciously. They walked with measured step now, reluctant to advance but unwilling to seem so. "Inaquee! I have never spoken to any of the First Hand before."
"At least there are only four superior to Inaquee, and we'll probably have to report to them all!" said Binatree.
"Usunee!"
"Usunee!"
"Do you believe we will be sent to Usunee?" Unustree gasped in excitement.
"It appears to be inescapeable," Binatree said. "No one else seems willing to make a decision. Orpensnucestees!"
"Oh, my! Oh, my!"
They arrived at Inaquee's hut.
Inaquee was one of the First Hand, the most powerful of the Eatopygiastees. Her station was reflected in the shortness of her name, which was not merely a contraction, but her entire formal title. She had achieved her high rank by exercising extraordinary good judgment and aplomb under pressure time and again, and all who dealt with her unanimously agreed she was supremely deserving of her name. But unfortunately, she was relatively young and considered to be quite comely, which engendered the inevitable uncharitable rumors amongst the ignorant. Consequently, she took great pains to be cold and businesslike at all times. Perversely, though, this behavior only seemed to reinforce her reputation as an unscrupled, ambitious, ruthless hypocrite.
She took refuge in the thought that the others of the First Hand knew her for her qualifications. This did not prevent some of them from being jealous of her, though. But there was always one on whom she could rely for support: Usunee. Whatever the situation, he would verify her decisions, and she had never failed him. Her decisions would unfailingly prove to be correct and wise.
Someone was outside her door.
"Orpensnucestees!"
"Oh, my!"
"Aexfee! Now what?" she muttered to herself.
Some time later, she looked down at the two signatures on yet another idascee. "Say good-bye to these, ebeshees. A fascinating report, loyal omofinishees," she complimented them. "Then, in your opinions, this, er, monster of yours is not part of a larger sortie?"
"No."
"No."
"No."
"No," answered Binatree. "At least, we saw no others like it. Thank the Orsnumquammee!"
"And you see everything, I'm sure. Then, in your opinions," Inaquee went on, "this creature could be a scout or spy sent from an unknown antagonistic force?"
"Uh - "
"Well..."
"Antagonistic?"
"You see," Unustree explained, "it really did not seem to be terribly threatening. Except for its size."
"Don't forget how big it was! It was big!" added Binatree.
"Icsee, big. You very adequately described its size in your report," said Inaquee. "Now, why did you feel you had to run back to Bisuree, unless this, this thing threatened you in some way?"
"It roared at us!" volunteered Unustree.
"Roared?"
"Well, screamed, more like," clarified Binatree.
"Screamed?"
"Actually, it was most like a loud growl," said Unustree uncomfortably.
"It growled?"
"She knows! All right! All right!" Binatree burst in. "The monster belched at us. Burped. It was eating acabee, and it burped. It was horrible! You had to be there."
"Why did you tell her that, adospee?"
"'She knew it already! I could feel it!"
"You could feel it! Orpensnucestee! Feel this!" Unustree slapped Binatree on the back of the head.
"You got us into this!"
"I did? Who stole Inanilquatertrinaquee's stylus? That's what started this!"
"Tried to steal! I didn't steal it, did I? I gave it back!"
"I'm sure that impressed him!"
"Ebeshees! Now I see why they were in the Mists to begin with! Asmees, please, let us continue," said Inaquee calmly. "Now, the 'monster' burped, and you came back to report. Thank goodness it didn't aexfee!"
The outriders were embarassed.
"Icsee, Inaquee," they mumbled.
"Icsee," she repeated. Their story was, to be sure, improbable, but she believed they were sincere about it, for what that was worth. Furthermore, she was disturbed by their account of the physical size of their sighting. A number of such creatures could indeed pose an ominous threat to the Eatopygiastees. And while she was inclined to send these incompetants straight back out to the Mists and increase their term, she hesitated to trust the safety of the entire race to them in the event that their creature was indeed the vanguard of Usunee's dream attackers. And considering the general nervousness aroused by Usunee's directives of late, she wasn't too sure that these omofinishees hadn't performed their duties perfectly after all.
"Wait here," she commanded them, and walked out of her hut.
"We're dead."
"Icsee. Dead."
Usunee listened intently as Inaquee related the events of the omofinishees' report. When she finished, he asked few questions.
"Did it see them?"
"They were not sure," she answered.
He sighed. "Did it speak to them?"
"Only the, uh, burp."
"Unfortunate. Did its eyes seem very close to each other?"
She was surprised by this question. "What? I don't believe they approached near enough to make out details of its features through the acabee."
He frowned. "But it was about twice our height?"
"Icsee."
"And it made no effort to conceal itself?"
"That is right."
"It did not, at any rate, attack them?"
"No. Usunee, what do you think it is? Is it a danger?"
He looked at her intently. "Follow your judgment, Inaquee. Send the omofinishees back out, but do not demote them. Whether they were brave and loyal in their motives to report this sighting, or cowardly and ebeshee, does not matter now. Instruct them to bring this 'monster' of theirs to me here. It will not harm them, if I am correct. They should be made to understand that they are not to attempt to harm it.
"Why? What is it, Usunee?"
"If I am right, and I have been right before," he smiled, "the Eatopygiastees need no longer fear attack. Their 'monster' will save us and will guide us. Inaquee, I believe Igilvee has ventured out of the mists to aid us. Tell the outriders to bring Igilvee to Bisuree. Go."
"Igilvee! We're dead!" Binatree said, shocked.
"Igilvee! Oh, my!" moaned Unustree. Inaquee had just informed them of Usunee's instructions.
"Do not fear," she went on. "You will come to no harm. If Usunee is right! Usunee himself expressed an opinion that you may have been brave and loyal in exercising your duties; you are not to be demoted. And you need not fear the Orsnumquammee."
"Unless it isn't the Orsnumquammee at all! How shall we convince Igilvee to return with us?" Unustree asked.
"Usunee says Igilvee will want to come, that Igilvee only leaves the mists to help the Eatopygiastees," she answered. "And I can add a little incentive for you myself. If you succeed in this assignment, I believe a respectable promotion may be in store for both of you! I can't believe I said that!"
"Did you hear that, ofaexedee? You are too kind!" protested Binatree.
"She wants us! Oh, how can we thank you, lovely Inaquee?" effused Unustree.
"Lay off that, ermisvee! We'll be going now," said Binatree, hastily grabbing Unustree by the arm and directing him toward the door.
"I'm going to be sick! Good luck, good asmees!" she called after them. "Good riddance!"
They strode rapidly away from Inaquee's hut.
"Promotion! I was right! It's an Orsnumquammee, eh?" said Unustree skeptically. "It didn't look like an Orsnumquammee to me!"
"Oh, right! As if you've seen an Orsnumquammee lately! I wonder how Usunee knows what it is?" said Binatree.
"Usunee knows everything. No one has seen Igilvee. Not for long generations past, I have heard. Until us!"
"Curse it! What a promotion we'll pull down! Do you think we'll get a one-hand hand name?" Binatree asked eagerly.
"Why not? We'll be famous! An inaquee-hand name!" Unustree exulted.
"An aterquee-hand name!"
"An Inatree-hand name!"
"Forget that!" said Binatree aloofly. "You shall become Inabee, and I shall become Usunee! Cursed right!"
"You are overlooking the fact that I currently outrank you," reminded Unustree. "In fact, I will be made Usunee, and you will be named Inabee!"
"Good enough!" cried Binatree merrily, and they locked arms and turned a little circle in the dusty path to celebrate.
"And all we have to do," Unustree went on, "is capture Igilvee the Orsnumquammee, guardian and benefactor, who has not been seen or heard from for long seasons out of count."
"That's all! Let's go!" Binatree continued his festive jig, but Unustree grew quiet.
"What have you got us into, now?"
"Me?"
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